Donnerstag, 29. August 2013

Katastrophenmanagementplan

Zur Verhinderung des Streisand-Effekts  hier ein in aller schnelle getippter Leitfaden für Socialmedia Katastrophen. Wer Flüchtigkeitsfehler findet, darf sie behalten.

Perspektive

... ist das wichtigste. Ja, Domi hat Mist gebaut. Und ja, das wurde öffentlich gemacht. Aber so läuft das im Internet. Das ist blöd, aber eben auch wieder gut. Denn das heißt, dass Domi nur eine von sehr, sehr vielen Leuten ist, die sich daneben benommen haben. Selbst in dem Vortrag/Stream ist sie nur eine von vielen. Die meisten werden sie nicht mal wahrnehmen. Noch weniger werden sie aktiv suchen. Und niemand wird sie vom Bild her erkennen (im Stream). Und es gibt zahllose solche Vorträge. D.h. auch dieser wird mal vom Tisch sein.

Zu vermeiden

... ist der Streisand-Effekt. D.h., dass ihr die Leute erst auf Domi und ihr Fehlverhalten aufmerksam macht. Ihr wollt da keine Öffentlichkeit.
Lächerliche Drohungen wegen "rechtlicher Maßnahmen" machen alles nur schlimmer. Auch Verleumdungen der Leute, von deren Goodwill alles abhängt, sind nicht gut.
Es hat nämlich niemand ein Zitat von Domi "mit einem Foto versehen". Das war sie selber. Sie selber hat quasi öffentlich ein Plakat mit ihrem Foto und ihren sprachlichen Entgleisern an eine Litfaßsäule mitten in der Innenstadt gehängt. Sie hat keinerlei Recht, Leuten ein Zitieren zu verbieten. Mit Bild oder ohne. Es ist ja nicht mal eine kommerzielle Veranstaltung gewesen. Oder ein kommerzieller Stream.Wobei selbst komemrzielle Zeitungen und TV Sender ungefragt Tweets von Leuten veröffentlichen. Und das auch dürfen.

Wenn entsprechende Droh-Mails oder Einträge gesendet werden, bleibt man erst mal ruhig. Das mag schwer sein, besonders für Domi, aber als Elternteil sollte man da stark bleiben. Drohungen im Internet sind

1) Meistens nicht ernst zu nehmen. Die Frau, die Domi in ihrem Vortrag zitiert hat, bekommt das Hundertfache davon. Und lebt immer noch. Ohne Bodyguard.

2) Darauf aus, Reaktionen hervor zu rufen. D.h. durch zur Schau gestellte Emotionen ermutigt man dieses Verhalten noch.

3) Oft eine bescheuerte Art von "Humor". D.h. man sollte sich nicht über eine Liste namens "Speisekarte" aufregen. Das ist albern.

Rettungsplan

Es ist geschehen, das Kind hat Blödsinn gemacht. Was nun? Weiter eskalieren? Drama machen? Nein.

1) Den Dialog suchen. Per E-Mail oder Telefon an die Veranstalter wenden. Besser per E-Mail, wenn man emotional aufgewühlt ist. Sachlich bleiben. Ihr seid auf deren Kulanz angewiesen. Den Betreibern zu unterstellen, sie würden "die IP bekommen" ist nicht unbedingt richtig und beinhaltet den Vorwurf, dass damit ungesetzliches getan würde.

2) Nicht darauf beharren im Recht zu sein, wenn man es nicht ist. Beleidigung ist in Deutschland eine Straftat. Das fällt nicht unter "Redefreiheit". Und die F-Worte fallen deshalb auch nicht unter Redefreiheit. Stattdessen sachlich die Lage schildern, ohne das Ganze wieder zu einer Selbstdarstellung verkommen zu lassen.
Etwa so:
"Domi ist noch sehr jung. Sie wurde vom rauen Umgangston im Internet mitgerissen. Sie war sich der Konsequenzen ihrer Handlung nicht bewusst, weil sie einfach nicht nachgedacht hat. Ich bin enttäuscht, dass sie sich auf diese Weise geäußert hat. Wir wissen, dass wir keine Handhabe haben, bitten aber um Nachsicht. Sie hat ihre Lektion gelernt. Um eine Gefährdung ihrer beruflichen Zukunft durch eine Jugendsünde auszuschließen, bitten wir darum, dass ihr Bild verpixelt wird"
Das wirkt besser als das hysterische Flüchten in eine Opferrolle und beharren auf der Fehlerlosigkeit der Tochter.


3) Im Falle von ernstzunehmenden Drohungen wendet man sich an die Polizei. Im Stillen. Ansonsten gilt: Cool bleiben. Blocken. Löschen. Nicht drauf reagieren.

4) Insgesamt: Cool bleiben. Kein Kommentar zu der Sache abgeben. Eine Weile den Ball flach halten und persönliche Daten aus dem Netz nehmen (Nicht die Leute vorwarnen, dass man die Bilder entfernt und sie noch "5 Minuten gucken dürfen". Das tun nämlich auch die Angreifer und nutzen die Zeit, um die Bilder zu sichern). Den Twitteraccount auf "privat" stellen. Die Sache aussitzen. Wird meiner Meinung nach keinen Monat mehr dauern und es kräht kein Hahn mehr danach. Und ohne das Drama, das Domi gemacht hat, hätte vielleicht auch nie ein Hahn angefangen, danach zu krähen. (man weiß ja leider nicht genau, wann sie die ominösen Drohungen bekommen hat. Ich hab das so verstanden, dass es nach ihrer Forderung war, sie zu anonymisieren). Denn ein Angriff, wie er beschrieben wurde, fand nicht statt. Auf Twitter wurde keine Hetzkampagne gestartet. Keine Angriffe. Es spricht alles für einen Einzeltäter, der sie auf die Palme bringen wollte und einen sehr fragwürdigen Sinn für Humor hat.

5) Prävention: Insgesamt vorsichtiger mit persönlichen Daten sein. Selbstdarstellung schön und gut, aber das Internet kann ein gefährlicher Platz sein. D.h. vorsichtiger mit Bildern, mit Realnamen, mit Adressen. Und außerdem nur Sachen unter Realidentität sagen, die auch der Arbeitgeber sehen dürfte. Am besten NUR Sachen sagen, bei denen man sich auch außerhalb des Netzes nicht schämen würde. Aber das ist wohl Utopie. Im Falle von Domi, die als junge Frau noch in ihrer Rollenfindung ist, wäre diese Vorsicht auch aus anderen Gründen angebracht. Im Zuge der Selbsterfahrung durch Selbstdarstellung ist Domi nämlich auch deutlich älteren männlichen "Fans" gegenüber recht arglos und zugewandt. Da kann sie schnell einen Stalker an der Backe haben. Muss nicht passieren, kann aber passieren. Also: Vorsicht.

6) Nochmal: Redet wie vernünftige Menschen  mit den zuständigen Veranstaltern. Domi soll sich entschuldigen. Nicht Drama heraufbeschwören, was gar nicht sein muss. Nicht den Streisand-Cruise-Effekt heraufbeschwören.



Ende

Samstag, 3. August 2013

Stop it already

Stop it already!

The BIG topic filling my Twitter time line since weeks is "feminism". And I have to say that, no matter for which side you advocated, many of you who commented on the topic made me want to puke. Warning: Lots of bad words used.

1. There are people raging against feminism. Or RTing assholes (who talk so much about "daddy issues" of feminists that i'm increasingly certain that they just project their mommy issues) raging against feminism. What the fuck is your problem? Don't use a few loud extremists as an excuse to pour your "humorous" retro-sexism over the internet. Treat them as the loons they are. Else you are no better than people who say "all men are rapists". Unpleasant experiences with one sort of extremist shouldn't mean you turn to the OTHER side of extremism on this spectrum. There are bad people just waiting for opportunities like that.

2. There are women (or men) being proud of bullying people in the name of "feminism". No, you don't establish "free space" for yourself or others. You just fuel the vicious circle in a totally unhelpful way. E.g. if we consider men's way of taking more space while sitting as an abuse, I want the shrieking voices of groups of women ALSO to be considered as abuse. They also take "space", even if not materially, with little respect to other people's needs. Being a self-centered asshole is no gender specific problem of our times. It's a society problem. Being a self-centered asshole is what the media glorifies at the moment as the ideal of a creative, quirky, cool and unique individual. But if someone crosses your comfort lines, don't bully back. Don't escalate. Ask politely and tell them "i feel bad because of it, can you please stop?". Or, on Twitter, block them without making a big fuss if you don't want to talk about it. That usually works.

3. There are WOMEN who show horrible misogyny. And constantly rage against feminism (not about a certain event or extremists, but feminism in general). Or against women in general. Those women just aim to be perceived as the "good exception". To achieve that goal they won't hesitate to create a narrative of the "average women" being more bimbo-ish, "feminazi" (or whatever negative female traits there can be) than they are in reality. Such women are usually attracted to male peer-groups where there are no other womens to "compete" with. (Thus this type of women is who usually enters hooligan groups, neonazi groups or other gang-ish traditionally male groups) If other females enter, most likely drama ensues. Even if the entering females are not interested in competition. Because such misogynist women are constantly competing in absentia with the whole female population of the planet, but are too coward to be confronted with them directly. Fuck you. Seriously: Fuck you. The most despicable acts on the whole planet stem from people who can't control their urge to degrade others on order to raise themselves up. Pose as much as you want. But don't do it by pushing others down just to get yourself up. That's just vile and pathetic. The lowest of human instincts.
Those women can be easily recognized by their catchphrase "feminists are feminists because they are ugly!". The competition regarding "attractiveness" is very clear in such statements. Because what does it NOT say but implicate? "thus: I'm no feminist because I AM ATTRACTIVE. DID YOU HEAR ME? ATTRACTIVE!". Protip: People might think to themselves "Only bad products need constant advertising". Thus it is in your own interest to find different and less hostile ways to deal with your insecurity.

4. There are modern hipster feminists who are just about posing. While, like I said, posing is not that bad, it certainly is annoying. Stop treating feminism as some sort of fashion accessory. Feminism is not just a cool "vintage" (the fuck, use the words SECOND HAND or USED, not the unbearably pretentious "vintage"!) dress you found on that adorable little flea market and bought for 500$ because the look of a 70ies bag lady has some ironic romantic appeal to you. Feminism is not exotic or retro or whatever. It's here to stay. And like every "movement", the most important parts are the countless, boring, tedious every-day things that don't require blog posts, protest marches or constant media attention. So, yes, basically the feminists piss me off that act like the average Anonymous member. Sensationalistic, un-pragmatic, self-centered escalationists. Yes, I made that word up just now. And yes, of course not ALL Anonymous members are like that. And yes, there is maybe a lower rate of such people in feminism than in Anonymous. But it still pisses me off.

5. People using the term "feminazi". Do I need to say more? Godwin's law. Stop comparing every shitty first world discord with something that was so horrible that nobody of us can ever even start to imagine the terrors and the sheer sum of human agony. You abort every potentially useful outcome of a discussion with this word. With a coat hanger.


Feminism is important for me and for the whole society. Many goals were reached, many still lie ahead of us. I acknowledge the importance of extremists point of views. They sort of set the frame to the field in which public discussion takes place (in the middle of said field, usually). But In my eyes it is harmful if we (men, women, everything in between and no matter what our point of view is on this) let extremism hijack the discussion about this important topic. And in my eyes that is happening right now: Two extreme sides growing like cancer that both piss me off and make constructive discussions impossible. Either by trolling or by stuff that otherwise derails the discussion. Don't feed the trolls. Don't assume or CLAIM the extremists would be the norm just to strengthen your point by creating a bogeyman. Because that CREATES extremists. On both sides. Vicious circle.
Am done now.
Will maybe delete rant tomorrow.
No spell checking.
Must be full of errors.
And bad words.
My apologies for the bad words.
P.S.: I NEVER generalized here, I always said "some people". In all items. Generalizing is bad. Don't do it.


Greetings,
the feminist Duck (Don't gasp in surprise now. Most feminists are like me. Simply and quietly pursuing fairness in every day life. Baby steps. That doesn't mean, of course, that more vocal people are not needed. They are needed. But, as in all movements, extreme people tend to be vocal. So don't make the mistake to declare vocal people "the average")

Montag, 8. Juli 2013

Taking No More Batshit Today




Taking No More Batshit Today


Since Twitter is fairly limited, I’ll shortly explain the situation here. For those not involved: It's just another Presstorm drama. 

Those who know me know that I usually take lots of shit before getting angry. And that point is reached with Becca. This is fairly surprising, because I actually don’t even know her. Yet she makes a habit of bullying me. And even proudly admits to that, even though she calls it “vengefulness” and “coming after [me]. Always.”
 

It all started half a year ago. I didn’t know Becca, I don’t even remember if we followed each other at that time. It was all rather civil. Then suddenly, from one day to the other, I was the most evil person on the planet according to her. I never heard what happened to enrage her, and I didn’t care since I didn’t know her. I’m wary when it comes to people who act so randomly.  


Quite some time later something weird happened. 
@Cigar_X (I had to look that name up, because I didn’t really know that guy either. Aside of rare RTing news tweets of each other, no interaction happened) allegedly threatened her. I say “allegedly” because I have no clue what happened there. Anyways, Becca suddenly deblocked me and was nice. Weirdly nice, with <3 and “I love you ducky” and “you’re my friend” and whatever. I thought: OK, weird. One day I’m the devil, suddenly I’m her most cherished duck? But who am I to reject friendliness? Some people are extreme like that. Though it hints to an unstable personality. 


So far so good. But the plot thickened. Suddenly I received DMs from Becca and got tagged in Tweet discussions she had about @Cigar_X. That’s when I learned that some drama was going on.  Call me a naïve duck, but I didn’t suspect bad. I was worried about the situation and also confused. Why did she turn to me? Why did she try to drag me in? For my qualities? I doubt that. I was puzzled back then, but today I suspect that she thought I was close to her “enemies” and could “work” for her if she pulled the right emotional triggers. Since I was totally oblivious to the whole drama, I asked a lot of questions to understand what was going on. I never managed to understand it, because it was such a big, tangled mess. What I did gather, though, was that Cigar threatened her and she spent a lot of time after that sending him fake nude pics to “bait” him into telling her his dox. After he allegedly threatened to rape her. I voiced my concern with this method and how it would ruin her gathered evidence if she wanted to get a restraining order. Because boob pictures would be clearly seen as an encouragement. Aside of that I pointed out a few other problems I gathered from her DMs and the Twitter discussions that then frequently flooded my timeline.  First she took to that very well and explained stuff. This nearly caused me to get involved. But the weird and freaky means by which that battle was fought (not to mention a few points other people raised that confused me even more) and the fact that I still didn’t get exactly happened caused me to rethink. I didn’t know Becca. I didn’t know Cigar. And changing stories cause my alarm bells to ring. Her stories did change. I’m not saying that this means Cigar did not threaten her. It just means that the person who wanted my support didn’t provide me with stable facts to work with. And since most drama happened while I was asleep in Europe, I decided to stand back. So all I did was telling the person who doxed her in private that what he did is not good. Especially not posting the nude pics, even if she claimed they were fake, or talking about her family. And that, even if she does similar bad stuff, that doesn’t mean that it’s ok to do the same shit. That was AFTER she raged at me and treated me like shit again.


Thus started the Becca’s “vengefulness”. That means: She blocked me but monitored my timeline and tweets of her friends to find opportunity to attack me and make people gang up on me. While me being unable to respond to her slander. Because I’m blocked.  She claims this happened twice and only when I “attacked her friends”. It actually happened three times. Once when two other people and I discussed time travel and time travel movies. Primer is a good one, by the way. The next time was a rather arbitrary insult attack on me after someone RT’d me and was engaged in friendly talk with me. She then tried to make it look like a joke in order not to alienate our common friend. Said friend preferred to believe the harmless story instead of worry about my claims that Becca has an agenda of bullying me. 


The third incident happened yesterday. A “friend” of hers insulted someone as “fat”. I voiced my dismay with this sort of personal attack. It is irrelevant and just an insult. She gleefully jumped in to unleash a shitstorm. Including vile insults and the most crazy slander.  Cigar_X, who afaik left Twitter because of the drama, has in her story now turned to a “rapist”. Weird. In my world a man needs to rape somebody before he qualifies as a rapist. And she started telling all people who’d listen (or not listen) I was a “rapist supporter” und would have gotten informations about her, Becca, from @bitchiest. Needless to say: No. That never happened. There was no “conspiracy”. I was NOT “coming after [Becca]”. I didn't support anybody. I just kept my beak outside because unqualified meddling makes situations WORSE, not better. Even if done by ducks. And at that time I hadn’t really talk to @bitchiest for at least half a year. And I never, not once in my life, talked with @bitchiest about Becca at ALL. And this third random attack, combined with the crazy slander, did it. I’m not taking this bullshit anymore. Taking no more out-of-the-blue attacks, taking no more attempts to turn twitter pals against me. 


I don’t know if she herself believes her story about the conspiracy or if she made it up because she’s angry that I didn’t let her utilize me and THEN started to believe it herself. And frankly I don’t care. This behavior, stalking me for months, “coming after me”, as she calls it, it batshit crazy. And the conspiracy story itself is even more crazy. She has a mental illness, yes. But if she doesn’t even attempt to control it and instead stalks and bullies me based on some weird delusion of hers, I’ll go forth and call that crazy. And I’ll tell the people I talk to, which she tries to make attack me, that she is batshit crazy and has a mental illness. And that they shouldn't let themselves be dragged into this drama. Because I’m done with pretending here would be something worth to discuss. There isn’t. There is a manipulative bipolar maybe-sociopath. And I feel bad for the people who were lured into attacking me. Because their good character was exploited by a batshit crazy person to fight her fights for her, who uses her illness as a fool’s license and as a shield. 


If the whole “batshit crazy” talk offends you, let it be said I respect people who deal with their mental illnesses. But I don’t respect people who deliberately and maliciously unleash their illness on others, with no attempts to control it. And someone who defends calling other people “fat” shouldn’t be too much a sissy about someone mentioning her mental illness. Especially because her mental illness, unlike e.g. weight, does considerably contribute to the problem I discuss here. 


That’s it. Decide for yourself if you want to be part of her "vengefulness", aka batshit crazy stalking and bullying. 

UPDATE December 2013
According to informations I got she apparently still follows my account with at least 2 sock accounts. Oh joy.
 

Regards, 
- Justice Duck